So this year it was a treat rather than a trick.
The news of yesterday is that, for the moment at least, the cancer is in check and I can take a deep breath and contemplate what parts of my life I can start again since a great deal of it has been on hold since June. Of course, the PSA number going down doesn't mean that I've "beat cancer" or any such ridiculous concept, it just means that for the moment we've got a stand-off going on and I can't let up lest I fall into the hole of self-congratulation. So I've resisted going on a bender (alcohol, burger, or other type) and I'll try to start to take stock this weekend about what in my life should move forward and what will still have to be left for later now that I have this small opening. It always takes me a while to sort this stuff out and I don't expect that this time will be any different.
The usual Halloween message from me is to point out that my pagan ancestors knew that this time of year is about death and rememberance -- a time to deal with the transitory nature of this incarnation head on and to remember to put our lives within the context of the temporary. It is ironic that this year I have a small message of life while at the same time the tentacles of death still have themselves wrapped around my organs of procreation. And it is also ironic that, this being the case, the message hasn't changed but, if anything, has deepened because of this fact.
Life is, indeed, short. Do what you should do and love well and deep. And do it now. Right now. None of us know how much longer our particular number is going to go down, but only that it won't go down forever.
Happy Halloween.
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